Kagome's Inuyasha Parlour
by Adept of the Angels
Summary: ONESHOT. Spoiler-free. In a not-so-normal and not-so-calming morning after a not-so-friendly run-in with Yura of the Demon Hair, Kagome decides that this was a crime that she would not have on a mane that beautiful. Post episode 4, Yura of the Demon Hair.


**Summary:** In a not-so-normal and not-so-calming morning after a not-so-friendly run-in with Yura of the Demon Hair, Kagome decides that this was a crime that she would not have on a mane that beautiful. Post episode 3, Yura of the Demon Hair. Spoiler-free. Pre Kagome/Inuyasha friendship.

 **A/N:** My first story in years, and no matter how pointless and suckish it is, I'm pretty damn proud of myself because screw you, writer's block! Five years in your grip and I still managed this!

I'm rewatching Inuyasha, and Yura's comment in episode 3 sparked an idea. It's rather silly, but I like the thought, so I hope at least some of you are entertained by this ^^

 **Disclaimer:** I own nothing!

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 **Kagome's Inuyasha Parlour**

 _Staaare._

It was a late afternoon, just shy out of the village that Kaede-baba inhabited, into the forest that was Inuyasha's namesake, at the trunk of the Goshinboku. Said hanyou was leaning at the base of the Sacred Tree, staring at its petals as they trembled, before the breeze plucked them off selectively and thrust them into the air.

 _Staaaare._

The night before, Inuyasha was struggling for his life in this very forest against Yura of the Demon Hair. The female demon had both him and the Kikyo-lookalike entangled in masses of tresses, ripping at their skin as she controlled the strands from afar. Inuyasha grimaced at the memory, remembering being unable to see the damned strands, even as they bit into his flesh and sought to tear of his head.

 _Staaaare._

Whereas the stupid human girl had been perfectly safe, wrapped in his crimson haori—trying to get herself _killed_ instead of running away which she was supposed to.

 _Keh,_ thought the hanyou. He lifted his nose into the air in an indignant fashion. _I was doing just fine on my own!_

 _Regardless,_ his stupid brain decided to tack on, _that_ she _was the one who had found Yura's weak point and then proceeded to utilize the knowledge…_

Inuyasha's brow twitched in annoyance. His shoulders sank deeper into the trunk of the Goshinboku, arms crossed.

 _Staaaare._

 _Who cares?_ Inuyasha scoffed internally. In his mind it was ultimately him who had done all the work, seeing as she would never have lived to do anything with it had he not given her his haori.

 _Staaaaaaaaaare._

So then _why_ did the girl keep _staring_ at him like that, as though she thought he was responsible for everything?

Unable to take it any longer, Inuyasha spun on her, meeting her narrowed eyes with a scowl.

"Oi," he snapped, almost nose-to-nose with her. He saw her jump a little, before her eyes widened and blinked at him in question. "What is it with you?"

"Eh?"

The sound slipped out innocently, and it only succeeded in making the hanyou's brow twitch again.

"Keh!" he scoffed, inclining his entire body away from her—so that she _knew_ how displeased he was with her presence. "Stop staring at me!"

This only made her blink more, but not in confusion this time. From the corner of his eye, he noticed her eyes study something at the crown of his head. His ears automatically flattened at the possible attention they were getting, but soon her focus glided down to his shoulder, to his elbow, and then finally all the way to where the tips of his silver tresses rested in the grass.

"She was right . . .," the girl mumbled. A frown creased her forehead. Inuyasha's body tensed at the sight as an image of an angered Kikyo and the gleaming tip of a sacred arrow flashed across his mind.

Inuyasha watched her for all but three seconds before lifting his hand to flick her nose, to which she responded with a surprised squeal.

"Stop making Kikyo's expressions!" he barked, once more almost nose-to-nose with her. She held his stare for a moment, a fire in her dark eyes—the kind of determined look she had gotten when aiming that arrow the night before, hell-bent on hitting her target.

And then abruptly she was gone, having jumped to her feet before turning to dart away and disappear behind the trees. Inuyasha blinked after her for a moment, bemused. After all, _she_ was the one who followed _him_ that morning, insisting to join him at the base of the Sacred Tree—and now she was running away as though he had done her wrong.

He scoffed, dismissing the thought. Like he cared anyway.

It had taken Kagome all but a half hour, with her grandpa fussing over her like he did; finding ways to inform her of the origin of many things as he simultaneously scolded her for pulling off the anti-demon wards he had placed on the Bone Eater's well. He was there to go about it the moment she walked into the door—her mother calling a cheerful 'hello' at her appearance—followed her into her room, lecturing the origin of the various hair-strengthening shampoo bottles that she grabbed onto, on her way back out—her mother once again calling a happy 'be careful out there!'—into the well house, until she disappeared into the well's dark depths. Having lived with the old man she loved so dearly for the last fifteen years, she barely noticed; he spoke too much nonsense to bother wasting energy trying to listen.

On that day, though, Kagome was focusing her energy on something else entirely already.

The previous night—spending it entangled in Yura's disgusting collection of hair—had made her realise at least one thing, and after the Hair Demon had pointed it out, Kagome was hell bent on correcting it.

There was _no way_ that hair the colour of moonlight would suffer the disease of split ends. Not on her watch.

So it was convenient for Kagome to run into Inuyasha just as she entered the village, him noticing her instantly approaching.

"Oi!" he snapped, pulling his face into that ever-present scowl. "Where were you off to?"

She didn't answer, only moving forward like the woman on a mission that she was in that moment, grabbing one of the half-demon's ears as she passed.

"Ouch! Hey, let go of me!" She ignored him, and kept pulling until they were in Kaede's hut. "Ka-go-me! My ear, let go!"

The moment she let him go, Inuyasha nursed his ear, holding onto it with both hands. He was going to kill her, he growled internally. That Kikyo-lookalike was _not_ going to pull on his ears like he was a little _puppy_!

And he turned to tell her exactly that, already starting to snarl, "You—"

But before the words could leave his mouth, a bucket's worth of water flew into his face.

"There," said Kagome triumphantly, bucket still in her hands, grinning at the now soaking wet hanyou in front of her.

Said hanyou didn't move, seething as he felt the droplets slide over his skin, and made his haori stick to his body like an annoying piece of plastic. He stood for a moment more, letting his mind wade through the shock and catch up with what had just happened, before he directed his glare at the girl standing there grinning with a bucket in her hands.

"Why you little—" he started to snarl, but didn't come very far before said girl gave a cheerful "Sit, boy," which had his wet face greeting the hard ground in less time that it took him to say the word _wench_.

"Yura was right," Kagome sighed kneeling at his head and lifting a strand of his hair, studying the forked tip. "You really don't take care of your hair, do you?"

Ignoring her words, hearing nothing over the pound of his blood—be it the anger pumping through his veins or the faceplant reverberating through his brain, he didn't know, or care for that matter.

All he knew was that he was going to kill her.

"Why you . . ." he started to growl as he struggled to lift his head in an effort to glare at her again, but, before he got very far, another nonchalant "Sit, boy," had him exchange friendly hellos with the ground once more.

"Well," the current subject of the half-demon's murder fantasies chirped as though she had never stopped her musing, "I'll be fixing that."

And then with the _click_ of something opening and a peculiar _squirt_ noise, Inuyasha heard her rub her hands together before she sank her fingers into his thick, dripping hair. He yelped at the sudden contact, flinching away, but Kagome held his head fast to prevent him from getting very far. For a second her hands were gone, but then there was that _squirt_ noise again, and they were back, sinking between the strands and rubbing his scalp.

It took a moment for Inuyasha to recover himself, but soon he was struggling, pulling away from the touch before she could think of holding on again.

"Wh-what do you think you're doing!?" he stammered, but was pummelled to the floor again, this time by the weight of Kagome's body jumping on him instead of the command of the subjugation beads.

"Hold—still—" Kagome struggled, trying to push the hanyou down, hands still rubbing furiously onto his head, already practically up to her elbows in soap. "Why—is your hair—so thick?"

"What? What are you talking about?" Inuyasha, confused, if not a little freaked out, by the girl's actions. He fought to stand up, even as she threw herself down on him every time he managed to push himself up. "Stop—doing—that—get off of me!"

But the only response he got was, "Stop moving already!"

"Get off!"

"Hold still!"

Outside, passing by the hut, Kaede heard the struggle inside. Puzzled, she parted the mat hanging over the entrance to see Inuyasha thrashing pathetically on the ground, a very violently struggling Kagome straddling the his back, demanding that he not move—a demand that the hanyou was all too happy to deny her as he fought tooth and nail to throw her off.

"Ow! Stop that! It's getting into my ear!"

"Shush already!"

"Kagome!"

Kaede noted the small crowd that was starting to form behind her, wondering at the ruckus.

"Inuyasha," Kagome warned, "if you don't hold still, I'm going to tell you to sit!"

At the mere mention of the word, the subjugation beads glowed for an instant before pulling their prisoner down the entire way he had managed to struggle his way up with a protesting "Grrmph!" accompanying the painful _slam_.

Kaede shook her head at their antics and let the mat fall back into place, before continuing on her original trek towards her next sick or injured ward as though all was right in the world.

OMAKE

"It would have gone much better if you just held still," Kagome pointed out several hours later to an Inuyasha that had reserved himself to grumbling and rubbing his ear pathetically against floor of Kaede's hut at dinner—his food abandoned on the table—in a vain hope that the _infernal_ droplet of water in his ear would decide to slide out.

Her words went ignored, as the hanyou resumed pressing his head into the floor. He felt like his brain was swimming in all of the water that had been poured into his ears, and, if that wasn't bad enough, the damned liquid would not stop _sloshing_ around over his eardrums.

After watching him for a few moments, Kagome sighed and moved to stand up and approach him. "I can really help you with that—"

But before she could advance much further, he snapped himself upright and swivelled around to pin her down with the most ferocious glare he could muster, his grumbling increasing in volume until he saw that she wasn't coming any closer. He then proceeded to lift his foot to scratch at his ear—an action that had Kagome almost giggling at how dog-like he looked.

"The smell of lavender almost suits you, Inuyasha," Kaede mentioned lightly.

The hanyou halted his scratching at that, form going rigid. He then pushed to his feet, and, still grumbling, made for the exit. Kagome thought she could hear the words 'stupid Kikyo' and 'damned reincarnation' mixed between a series of profanities around a 'cursed time-travelling well'

"Inuyasha!" she called to him before he was gone. He paused at the exit long enough to hear her say, "You called me by my name again today!" only to scoff the most heartfelt and heated "Keh!" he had ever uttered.

And then he was gone, the scent of flowers and conditioner trailing a path for all that wished to find him.

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 **A/N:** I hope everyone's in character! Please review and tell me where I can do better :o)


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